The first place: Why do you have to choose yourself between husband & child?
Most people would agree or maybe recognize themselves in the next words – women devote most of their lives not to themselves (not including childhood).
They want to be the best in everything at school; to be in love with a boyfriend at the university; to get married, to give birth to a child, and to devote herself (all the love and attention) to the child. How else can it be? Every woman thinks kike that, our moms for example. Everything that was important before the arrival of a child goes to the background. The husband becomes the main helper, one more pair of hands, and full material support.
As a result, the woman (consciously or not) forgets everything, even herself. She is always tired and irritated, looks, and eats badly, and doesn’t have the energy. What to say about other family members or friends?
Motherhood is not only a time of priceless acquisitions but also of painful losses. Even the bravest mothers lose their personal space, time, sleep, peace, girlish slender, and friends.
If normal sleeping, physical shape, and freedom come back into your life over time when the child finally grows up, the lost personality may remain somewhere in the past. That’s why we have 10 ways for you not to get confused and not to lose yourself in motherhood.
To find a set of interests
What women do after childbirth? – That’s right, they sit on “mom’s forums” and follow all the mothers on Instagram. It’s a great opportunity to share, complain, and find out that you’re not so much wrong about something. But still, it would be better not to forget what else you’re getting carried away and inspired by.
To keep in touch with friends
Remember that mom’s role isn’t locked up in the tight lair. Open up to the world. Your friends who knew the time of your “smoky eyes” won’t be afraid of your current natural dark circles under your eyes and crying mood. Just give them a chance. Don’t torture your friends by telling stories about your baby pooping today, even if you want to.
Your hobby – this is the safe bet!
Get out of your routine. The strangest hobby will keep you afloat even during the most severe attack of apathy or rage. Yoga, stretching, tarot divination, cross-fit, drawing, writing, Tai massage. And all that your soul will sing from but not moan.
To chill out
Ask your husband to stay home and babysit the kids for a few hours and run away.
Go alone to the cinema, have a massage, sit in a cafe, visit your girlfriend or just lie all alone in the bathroom.
Reading classical literature, prose, and poetry revive our personality. Choose audiobooks when you don’t have much time. Listen to scientific and complicated lectures. As a result, your brain will wake up from sleep, surprise, and could repay you with new ideas and unexpected insights.
Sing, dance, and listen
Children’s songs are very important but don’t forget about the music that makes you want to dance and sing despite everything. Listen before bed, in the bathroom, when you’re cooking. It’s a great way to get distracted or take a trip down memory lane.
Talk about yourself
Don’t forget to talk about yourself to children. Let them know about your dreams, accomplishments, funny situations in which you got, and your adventures. It doesn’t have to be a moral or has an educational moment. These stories will convince your child that the mother is also human.
Break the rules
Do that like your kids’ older girlfriend from time to time. Let’s have ice cream for dinner a few times a month and go to the ZOO instead of school. Nobody would get harmed but your kids will remember it for the rest of their lives. A little rebellion against rules and schedules won’t hurt your child or yourself.
For a man his woman isn’t just a lover and wife – she’s a mother. A woman is tired, needs the physical and emotional support of her husband more than ever. This is a period (for him) when the attention of his beloved is already shared with the child.
The man expects from the woman the same caress, flirtation and if it disappears he can move away from the wife. Must be time for two people, not just for a child or work in a relationship. The more pleasant and unusual things in a relationship, the stronger the union.
Time for yourself – is what it takes for a woman to get back her husband’s favor. Give a rest to yourself, dare to ask for help, make pleasant procedures for body and soul. A bunch of unwashed hair, wrinkled nightgown before lunch can’t be justified by anything. Taking care of yourself is just as valuable as taking care of a child, no matter how tired a woman is. Choose yourself when you are setting priorities – the emotional state of the woman in the first place, and only then the husband and child.